Entries in church (2)

shuffle time

vogue kittypeek-a-kitty*gasp*

 

  • we are in the middle of "hello, kitty" madness.  last week she neeeeeeeded to have her face painted like hello kitty.  for all the prep work on my part, i was afraid she'd have it off in seconds.  but it lasted through 2 stores and an afternoon of play.  although by the end she looked more like an emo panda than a kitty.
  • my FIL gave me a plant that i have yet to kill.  this little amarillys didn't bloom, but it's not dead! win!
  • it's finally sunny and warmish today, my heart is so ready for spring.  H just giggled with joy when she realized we could play outside today.  my heart's not the only one ready for spring.
  • i've had two really awesome experiences with each of my parents this weekend.  feeling forgiveness and love on both sides.
  • conversation with G: "i'm going to have nineteen kids! but not all at once, one at a time."  "oh wow G, that's a LOT of kids!  do you want to be something as well as a mama? like, i'm an artist and a mama..."  "yeah! i'll be a ninja!"
  • i've forgotten what preschoolers are like,  we are having so much fun now.
  • we had a tree frog. for a day.  hoping the next one will be heartier, he seriously was the CUTEST THING i have EVER seen, and with kids like these i'm kinda an expert on cute.  my daughter was more put out by the fact that her frog died than saddened by it. i was sad. and cried.
  • my FIL is here for E's birthday celebrations (HAPPY BIRTHDAY E!)  and of course he has his dog here.  the kids have spent the past few days dressing up a farm dog. what a patient dog to wear scarfs and bunny ears.
  • i have a working oven!  praises be!  i'm now crippled with indecision as to what to bake first.  it's been two years of wonky heating issues and complete laziness in finding a replacement.  turns out it just needed a tiny part to be back on the road.  i'm choosing elation over bitterness. haha.
  • spent saturday at the park in inches of snow, it was like a calvin and hobbs snowday.
  • i've struggled so much with feelings of shame from my decision to leave the church.  fear that those i love within the church will reject me if our theology no longer matches.  my heart has been calmed substantionally in this regard and a complete peace and forgiveness for everything has flowed in my life. 
  • in yoga we focus on stamina, holding each pose until you feel your muscles begin to give out. it's in that moment that my teacher reminds us, "when you feel you can go NO longer, come back to your breath, take another and realize you can continue on." aint that the truth?
  • loosing my focus today, keep getting caught up in awesome conversations and truth telling, but it's doing nothing for my dishes.
  • my laundry is clean, the kids baskets overflowin...g with stink-free clothes. i wasn't supposed to actually put their clothes IN their drawers, right?
  • awrooooo!

with open arms

on an august evening i sat on my front porch in tears, hurt by people who i had considered dear friends, overwhelmed by my own expectations, embarrassed, and feeling very alone. as i sat pondering, i looked up to see geese flying overhead. my soul whispered, "you're simply a migratory bird."
as i've mentioned before i've moved a lot in my life, it's something that i've grown accustomed to. we have now lived in this home for about 3 1/2 years, longer than i've ever stayed in one place during my adult life. i've been itching to move but every time we take a step forward with it we have both felt unsettled, *now* just isn't the right time.
something else you need to understand about me is that i'm mormon. i not only attend church every week but do regular activities with people from my ward (congregation). a ward is very often like a family; you see one another weekly, serve one another, and get to know each other very well. wards are organized into stakes and are set up geographically all across the world, it makes it easier to get to know your neighbors. seeing that the population in utah is nearly 50% mormon there are wards very close to one another.
this week three stakes (about 3000 people in each stake) in our neighborhood (about 15 wards) are undergoing a major reconstruction. many wards are being realigned, boundaries reshaped, and people *moved* into new wards and stakes. are you following me here? our street is being divided and seeing that we live on the east side of the street we have been asked to attend a new ward in a new stake.
i couldn't be happier. my environment hinges very tightly on the ward i'm attending, so it will honestly be like moving... but without having to box anything up. it will be a complete change in my weekly routine. i'll have the opportunity to meet new people and make new friends, but still be close enough to stay in touch with those that i know and love.
on to the next adventure.