squam days: wednesday and thursday
September 24, 2009 at 6:37 PM i was busy packing like a nutter until 3:30 am on wednesday morning then woke up at 5:30 am to catch my flight. it def threw my day off, but i'm still glad i did it. my things were organized and i even remembered to send off postcards to my family so that they would get something from mama while i was gone.
i was lucky enough to travel with an awesome companion on the way out there. but mama has trouble with flying, well just trouble with the descent. when we landed in detroit i was drenched in sweat, doing whatever i could to keep from throwing up. and then we had to run across two terminals to catch our plane, ditching any thought of grabbing food for me.
amy and i ended up sitting across the aisle, kitty corner from one another and made for an entertaining flight for everyone. we had so much fun. until descent. and i really did throw up. boo. from then on i was pale and shaky and feeling terrible. amy scooped up all of our stuff, found georgia, and helped me get the rental. then it was a 90 minute drive up to squam lake, over hills and through twisty roads... and even though i was the one driving i was still feeling car sick and unable to eat.
finally we arrived and headed straight for the dining hall. and great was the rejoicing heard throughout the land. it was sweet joy to be encompassed by my sista's and to finally be there after a full year of waiting.
we headed for the bonfire and jonatha is truly amazing. but i still felt sick and shaky. so a few of us headed back to our glorious cabin and settled in. i gave georgia a back rub, the flights had been rough on all of us. and then finally headed for bed.
by morning i was still not back to 100% and i was truthfully beginning to wonder why i had come. i was a long way from home and still feeling yucky. at breakfast, even with the pleothora of delicious options, i wanted nothing. but then i got to class and finally i remembered again why i had come to squam. for the paint, for the technique, and for the love.
i got to spend the day sitting next to amy and by lunch my tummy was healed and my heart was full again. the day was a joy!
that evening we gathered together to watch this amazing, life-affirming movie:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9iLJFWlrdQ
i sat in the back and SOBBED through the entire thing, like serious ugly cry, blowing my nose into tissue after tissue, but feeling so understood and so normal. i've never felt "normal" before. ;-D
beautimous.
Reader Comments (7)
Holy. MOLY. Do you remember that little 3 minute conversation we had before I left? Wasn't this what we were talking about? How DO we do this. How are we mothers and how do we balance as artists? Amazing... I hope to find this film somewhere around here (maybe Nina and I can have a mama/artist date?)
Also, for some reason the font color here on your new site is too dark maybe? I don't know if this is like this for everyone but I usually have to highlight the post to see what you wrote because it fades into the black background... is it me?
awww dang. I just checked out the site and it won't be in the boston area any time soon... Maine, yes, but I think I've filled my "drive two and a half hours for a night out" quota for the rest of the year... hehehe
And what a magnificent backrub it was! How did we not have a whole evening of back rubs with everyone? Didn't we want to do that?
I am so happy I sat with you during this movie, it was so wonderful. And you were not the only one crying... I think Thea and I were both doing that too :)
xoxo
my aunt peggy, who is 85, had 8 children. she raised them, alone, on an artist's salary.
and you know she heard it from her mother, "you're crazy!"
she sketched pictures for fashion catalogs and magazines during the day and stayed up
late (still does) painting, welding, and working with clay.
she used to sell her work under the name of michael. she said that she would get more money
if the buyer thought she was a man.
she eventually stopped doing that...
what mamas do for their family and for their love being creative, yes?
love you, mama. xo
ditto...tears...love
Well, well, YOU have four children? Goodness woman, you are so young. What a great and inspirational momma you must be.
Thank you so much for taking the time, out of what must be a very busy schedule to come visit and leave such a lovely comment. I truly appreciate it. Even though we did not get to chat much at Squam, I could sense the fact that you have a beautiful spirit as I saw you breeze by occasionally. Yes, sharing the class was fun. Your piece turned out beautifully!!!
squam sounds glorious, and that movie sounds amazing, wish i had been there.