i was deeply touched last weekend by this talk given to an audience of the largest women's organization in the world, the relief society of the church of jesus christ of latter day saints (there are more than 5 million women worldwide). if you get the chance, please read it in it's entirety. i want to share with you the most poignant portion of it (from my perspective):

"The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul. No matter our talents, education, backgrounds, or abilities, we each have an inherent wish to create something that did not exist before.

Everyone can create. You don’t need money, position, or influence in order to create something of substance or beauty.

Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty—and I am not talking about the process of cleaning the rooms of your teenage children.

You might say, “I’m not the creative type. When I sing, I’m always half a tone above or below the note. I cannot draw a line without a ruler. And the only practical use for my homemade bread is as a paperweight or as a doorstop.”

If that is how you feel, think again, and remember that you are spirit daughters of the most creative Being in the universe. Isn’t it remarkable to think that your very spirits are fashioned by an endlessly creative and eternally compassionate God? Think about it—your spirit body is a masterpiece, created with a beauty, function, and capacity beyond imagination.

But to what end were we created? We were created with the express purpose and potential of experiencing a fullness of joy. Our birthright—and the purpose of our great voyage on this earth—is to seek and experience eternal happiness. One of the ways we find this is by creating things.

If you are a mother, you participate with God in His work of creation—not only by providing physical bodies for your children but also by teaching and nurturing them. If you are not a mother now, the creative talents you develop will prepare you for that day, in this life or the next.

You may think you don’t have talents, but that is a false assumption, for we all have talents and gifts, every one of us. The bounds of creativity extend far beyond the limits of a canvas or a sheet of paper and do not require a brush, a pen, or the keys of a piano. Creation means bringing into existence something that did not exist before—colorful gardens, harmonious homes, family memories, flowing laughter.

What you create doesn’t have to be perfect. So what if the eggs are greasy or the toast is burned? Don’t let fear of failure discourage you. Don’t let the voice of critics paralyze you—whether that voice comes from the outside or the inside.

If you still feel incapable of creating, start small. Try to see how many smiles you can create, write a letter of appreciation, learn a new skill, identify a space and beautify it..."

this talk echoed everything that i've been feeling since the moment i got to squam, nearly a month ago, but i haven't been able to adequately voice. there are two elements to that experience, it wasn't just the creativity that brought me happiness. it was also the second key in his talk: compassionate service. it was at squam that i felt more open, loving, and loveable than i ever have before. it's no wonder i felt so happy. it's also no wonder i'm struggling now to keep those ideas alive at home. i need to reach outside of myself and truly begin to love those that are around me, despite past hurts and offenses. i can recreate the beauty and love that i felt in new hampshire every day of my life, thus creating happiness in my heart.

this article by jen lemen was also pretty fantastic. what a wise, wise woman!