tagged 
childhood memoirs, just me, one deep breath, poetry
childhood memoirs, just me, one deep breath, poetry feathered foes...or um, friends
July 12, 2007 at 4:03 PM this weeks prompt for one deep breath poetry is "feathered friends." i can't seem to think of a single good memory i have with birds. i always wanted to be like cinderella or snow white and be so sweet that animals actually flew right up and landed on my fingers, and then proceeded to sew for me. but alas, i'm a spazz.
we have 3 nests of birds hiding in the nooks and crannies of our house, plus more in the trees. these birds don't bother me, although i do freak out when they suddenly fly out behind the bricks. and every other encounter i can think of with birds has been less than pleasant.
like the day when i was about 10 i was walking in the park, minding my own business, when i looked up momentarily to gaze at the clouds. PLOP! bird poop straight in the eye. i mean really, could they be any ruder?
or how about when i was around 13 my friend had a cockatail that everyone would get out of his cage and play with. he sang to everyone else. but when i finally got the courage up to carefully take him... he simultaneously bit me, pooped, and then flew away. and everyone was angry with me because they couldn't get him back in his cage. stupid bird.
so i *believe* that was my last encounter with birds until 2 weeks ago. we're sitting at a gas station with utah's state bird... the seagull... swooping around us:
seagulls jump to catch
the chips flying in the air
to my husband's glee
i sit petrified
as he opens my window,
i scream as they swoop
their beady red eyes
focus not on the chip but on
my terrified eyes
i scream and cry out
"shut the window please! i'm scared!"
as the tears flow out
my *mean* husband laughs
rolls down the window once more
and throws the last chip
i can look at it now and realize that i was overreacting, but MAN i was so scared and mad. with each chip he threw they would fly closer and closer to MY window. he was throwing them for the kids to be able to see the birds. but they were oblivious to anything but my screaming. plus i felt like we were wasting chips. shouldn't these birds be eating crickets (really, read the whole article) instead of cheetos? so it didn't exactly work out for anyone. poop.
Reader Comments (5)
I was bitten by a sea gull once... I was on a ferry going from Cape Cod to somewhere... and the gulls were following the ferry. So brilliant me, started to throw chips at them. They loved me. I was their best friend. Until one got impatient and instead of waiting for me to toss the chips, he flew up and tried to grab it out of my hand... It bit my fingers instead!
I was also bitten by a huge Parrot Fish in much the same manner once... only I was feeding them frozen peas.
sorry about your birdy woes, they certainly make for good stories!
We had a parrot that my parents got at an auction - my mom felt terrible that nobody was bidding on him and he was ancient. His name was Howard. He was so freaking mean, he cursed - he was huge and he was so loud at the break of dawn. I need to ask my mom what happened to him - but in a family that spawns children whose first sentences are "hate birds" I can't imagine we had one as a pet. I had totally forgotten that until now! And that was only when I was in like the 8th grade.
Howard. the bird.
I bit Grandma's arm and started grinding his beak - now that was pretty funny. All our animals flipped out on her when she visited because she was so mean to them! K - it wasn't funny that she got bit - just funny that the animals rebelled.
you aren't alone in your fear of birds.
I loved the poem. "the chips flying in the air"
very visual!
oh jenica,
i know you're anxious to move on past the waddling stage...but remember, it's the sleep-deprived stage that follows :-)
hang in there, girl!!!
xo
k
wonderful poem :) we have tons of birds in our garden and singing loudly at obscene hours of the night in the tree outside my bedroom window ...
i am sometimes scared when i go out that they will swoop down on me but they do look really cute swiping worms out of the dirt, ruffling my lettuce with their eating :)